Awa ndi masiku osangalatsa kwambiri pakati pa ife omwe timadziwa ndikuchita Yofatsa Kulankhulana. Marshall B. Rosenberg, mlengi wa yofatsa Kulankhulana, zakale zapita 7 February 2015 pa usinkhu wa 80 zaka (tinakondwerera kubadwa kwake miyezi ingapo yapitayo mu positi iyi), ndipo ife amene timamdziŵa iye ndi ife amene taphunzira chitsanzo chake mwachisawawa tikuchita zimene iye anatiphunzitsa: kukondwerera zochitika zomwe zakwaniritsa zosowa zathu ndikudzilola kuti timve chisoni zochitika zomwe zasiya zosowa zathu.

Ndinasangalala kuphunzira naye pamasiku asanu ndi anayi a International Intensive Training (International Intensive Training, IIT) ku Switzerland mu July ndi August 2008. Chithunzi chomwe ndili nacho ndi Marshall ndi mkazi wake Valentina chikuchokera ku mapangidwe amenewo., ndi chizindikiro chowonjezera cha kukhalapo kwa anyamata awiri osadziwika ndi mtsikana kumbuyo, zomwe zimagwirizana ndi chilimbikitso chimene Marshall anandipatsa m’ntchito yanga ndi ana, ndi achinyamata (werengani zambiri m'malo oyamba).

Masiku ano, momwe ndawerenga mauthenga osiyanasiyana ndi zikumbutso zomwe zachitika m'gulu la Nonviolent Communication, Ndapezanso mwayi wowerenganso zolemba zomwe ndidakumana nazo masiku amenewo ndili naye (komanso pagulu la ophunzitsa ena ndi ena onse otenga nawo mbali). Ndipo pambuyo pake idzakhala nthawi yowerenganso ntchito zake zonse, monga njira yotsitsimula ndi kulemekeza ntchito yawo.

Marshall Rosenberg adagwira ntchito kuti apange dziko laumunthu, kuzindikira mbali za moyo ndi kukula ngakhale muzochita zosamvetsetseka. Mawu ake enieni ndi “Chiwawa ndi chiwonetsero chomvetsa chisoni cha zosowa zosakwanira”, ndi njira yake, kulankhulana kopanda chiwawa, njira yoti athe kumvetsera ndikusinthanso mawu mpaka mayankho apezeka momwe mbali zonse zipambana.

Ndimaona kuti kugogomezera kwa Marshall pankhani ya kusintha kwa anthu kumakhala kopindulitsa kwambiri., sanafune kuti Kulankhulana Kwankhanza kutumikire kuti anthu azikhala odekha ndi moyo wawo. Ntchitoyi imayambira mkati mwa munthu aliyense, koma inu simungakhoze kukhala pamenepo, ndikofunikira kuti ifike kumagulu osiyanasiyana (zachuma, chikhalidwe, ndondomeko, zamaphunziro…) ndi kuwasintha powasintha kukhala anthu. Monga momwe iye mwini anatiuzira ku Switzerland: “Zimene timachita zimafanana ndi zimene munthu amaona khandalo likugwa pa mathithi n’kumupulumutsa., napenya wina, nampulumutsa, napenya wina, nampulumutsa… Panthawi ina zimakhala bwino kuti munthuyo adzifunse kuti ndani akuponya ana ndikukwera mathithi kuti apewe.”.

Kupatula ntchito yake yolembedwa (mabuku oposa khumi ndi awiri, mwa iwo Yofatsa Kulankhulana. chinenero cha moyo) ndi mavidiyo ndi zojambulidwa za ma workshop ake ndi nyimbo zake, Marshall anayambitsa Center for Nonviolent Communication (Center kwa Communication NonViolent), ndi mbiri ya zaka zambiri za ntchito, ndipo izi zakhala zikugwira ntchito popanda iye kwa zaka zingapo zapitazi. Zimasiyanso mazana a ophunzitsidwa ovomerezeka kuti chitsanzo chake chipitirize kufalikira ndi kukhulupirika ndi zikwi makumi a akatswiri omwe amayesa kuwunikira mikangano yathu ya tsiku ndi tsiku.. Ndi chinachake kukondwerera.

Nthawi yomweyo, imfa yake imasiya malo opanda kanthu. Kudziwa kuti wamwalira kunyumba kwake limodzi ndi mkazi wake Valentina ndi ana awo ndi chitonthozo chaching'ono.. Tikudziwa kuti sitidzamuwonanso akuyimira mikangano yatsopano, kuti sitidzamva nyimbo yatsopano, kuti sadzalemba mabuku atsopano. Ndipo izi zisanachitike, zimangotsala kuvomereza ndi chifundo zowawa ndi chisoni chomwe chikuwonekera.

Pokhapokha pophatikiza zochitika zonse tingathe kupita patsogolo mokwanira, kuphatikiza zomwe zidalandiridwa kuchokera kwa Marshall ndikuyang'ana, mphindi ndi mphindi, momwe mungasinthire m'njira yolemeretsa kwa aliyense.

Mu chikondwerero ndi maliro,

Xavier